- To Come Out Or Not, That Is The Question
- April 1st, 2011
So, yeah, I am really struggling with this at this point in my life. I am 39 and finally admitted to my self last year I am gay.
I am in the closet at this point due to my medical career and that is mostly why I feel I need to stay in the closet. I touch people for a living and here in the USA people are still over reactive to gay people, so I risk a lot in my career by coming out, by the same token I am not going to tell the hole world, just my closest friends, some who happen to be patients of mine already. I don't expect that its going to spread around the community like wildfire, so don't think it will affect my career. It could, all it takes is one nut!
I am not ready to tell my family yet, although I am sure they already suspect it. My dad is a total ass, like Archie Bunker. He will send out a mass email to everyone in the world saying "I knew it, he is a fag." He will never let it go, I get enough ridicule as it is, not sure I really need that on top.
Right now I have no one to lean on for support that is close by. My plan is to go on vacation to my friends who are gay and I know they will help me. I plan to send and email out to some of my close friends and go from there.
That is the plan, just not sure I can do it. I feel like I should just do it and be done with it, I am gay and that's that.
It is a big weight to lift off my shoulders, but I am sure it creates other problems in life as well.
Nothing is easy. It seems like it will be so liberating....
Just thought I could get some advice from those of you who have been through this.